• The Sunday Sermon: Watch out for Bears.

    10May
    Categories: The Sunday Sermon

    I apologize for missing out on last week’s Sunday Sermon. I’m just starting out work in the field after a lengthy winter break (one of the positive and negative aspects of having a job that requires the ground to not be frozen in a country where it is, in fact, frozen rather a lot). The first week or so of being back in the field involves a lot of muscles that have spent the last five months sitting idly at a computer suddenly having to learn how to use a shovel again and my downtime is spent sleeping instead of being on the Internet. But I’m back now and regular stories will keep on coming!

    This week’s story is from the Bible. It’s one of my favourites. It has all the great elements of a fun story - fights, curses, vengence through the use of…bears.

    Don’t Mess With the Bald.
    Judeo-Christian Bible. New International Version. Old Testament.
    2 Kings 2: 19-25

    The men of the city said to Elisha: “Hey buddy! Our town is perfect!  Although….come to think of it, our water is crap and the land is not so great either.”

    “Damn, that does kind of suck.” said Elisha, “How about this: bring me a bowl and throw some salt in it!” So they brought him a bowl and added the salt.

    Elisha went out to the spring and threw the salt into the water and said: “There you go! God has healed the water! It won’t kill anyone ever again!” And the water has been good ever since (although, presumably, somewhat salty).

    Then Elisha wandered off to Bethel. As he was walking peacefully along the road, some youths ran up from the town and started making fun of him. They took one look at him and burst out laughing at his strange appearance.

    “Haha! You are bald!” they yelled out. “Hey Baldy! Keep on walking buddy. You got to have hair in our town.” They continued to taunt him about his strange lack of hair.

    This pissed Elisha off.  He turned around, glared in their direction and threw a curse at them in the name of God.

    Two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty two of the youths.

    Elisha kept walking.

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